Chapter 36
Chapter 36
Chapter 36 In The Dark
Emma POV
This was the longest time I had spent in the dark. Or at least I thought it was. What did he do to me? Usually, I would wake up by now.
I couldn’t hear Eliza, but I did hear my brother and Logan talking to me. They were telling me things I really wanted to hear, but I knew it couldn’t be true. I knew that I was dreaming. They weren’t looking for me. They thought that I was a rogue and they moved on. Sienna was right. I was just a burden. They would finally be free when I die.
I dreamt about doctor Wren as well. I wondered why? I mean, I always liked him. We became good friends when I started volunteering at the hospital. But I really didn’t understand why I’d dreamt of him. I remembered him talking to me, telling me something that I couldn’t
understand. I took the opportunity to tell him that I was not a rogue. I asked him to tell Andrew not to hate me. I was aware it was a dream, but it somehow made me feel better.
I’d dreamt about Asher as well. Oh, Goddess, how much I missed him. He was the best wolf there was. He was the best brother there was. I dreamed about touching his soft fur, and it was the most joyful dream I’d had in a long time. It hurt so much to know that Asher hated me. I just wished that I could tell him the truth. I wished that I could feel his body wrapped around mine just one more time. He always used to do that when I was cold. He would wrap himself around me to keep me warm. He would lick my face while I whined and
protested. He would ignore my protests and grin at me playfully. I missed him a lot.
I could hear Andrew’s voice telling me that I was not a rogue. He told me that he would be next to me when I woke up.
My mind was playing games with me.
He won’t be next to me. He was back home, planning a Luna ceremony for Sienna.
When I woke up, Rolf would be with me. He would tell me how much my brother and my mate hated me. He would tell me that Sienna was a new Luna now. He would tell me that Logan marked her. He would finally be able to kill me.
But why wasn’t I waking up? I should have been awake by now, right?
This time, the darkness was different. Was I dead already?
But if I was, why couldn’t I see my
parents? Why couldn’t I move? Was this what death was? Was I going to spend eternity in the dark? What did I do to deserve this? Was I such a horrible person?
I felt my heart breaking into a million tiny pieces. I thought that I was crying, but I couldn’t be sure. I couldn’t feel my body. I couldn’t move my arms or legs.
I was trapped in the dark and I didn’t think I would ever be able to leave.
I would spend eternity here, thinking about all the things I’d done wrong.
Like the time when I was seven and hid in the tree-house. Mom and dad were away on a trip with Alpha and Luna. Andrew was fourteen at the time, and mom and dad thought he was old enough to leave us alone for a couple of days. I thought it would be fun to hide
from him. He was so angry when he finally found me. I guess that was one of the reasons why I was here.
I guess I earned myself a place in this darkness by sneaking out of the house with Amy and Jacob. I would lie to Andrew. I would pretend to be asleep and then leave through my bedroom window to hang out with Amy and Jacob at our hidden cave.
I was here for each and every time I was angry at Andrew. He gave his life away to raise me. I should have been more grateful. I should never have been angry at him because he didn’t believe me about Sienna.
Did rejected wolves came here? I wasn’t a good enough mate. I wasn’t a good enough wolf. This was my punishment for that. I couldn’t give Logan what he needed. He had to throw away the
Goddess’ gift because of me. I was surely being punished for that. It was my fault that he had to do it. If I was stronger, he wouldn’t have to reject me.
I was being punished for rejecting Jake. I hurt his feelings and I deserved this. He wanted to take me as a chosen
mate, and I refused. He was hurt because of me.
I was being punished for each and every time I put myself first. There were times I couldn’t volunteer at the hospital because I had a training session or I had to study for exams. I shouldn’t have done that. I should have gone to the hospital and help. Nôvel(D)rama.Org's content.
How could I forget all the horrible things I said about Sienna? I called her a bitch numerous times. I talked badly about her. I tried to ruin her relationship with my brother and Logan. I shouldn’t have
done that.
I’d done a lot more things that I deserved to be punished for. I ate snacks before dinner, even though I knew it was forbidden. I faked being sick a couple of times so I wouldn’t have to go to school. I tried
alcohol at a party once. I drove Andrew’s car without a permit once. I kissed Logan even though he had already chosen Sienna as his mate.
The list just went on and on.
The more I thought about it, the more tears fell from my eyes. Or at last that’s what I thought.
I still couldn’t move or feel my body. I just felt like I was crying because my soul was being ripped to pieces.
I was hoping to see my mom and dad
once I died, but I guessed that would not happen. I had a lot to pay for, and I would be trapped in the dark forever. I would be alone here forever.
If I could find my voice, I would sob and scream. But, like my body, my voice was gone too.
Related
March 2, 2023In "True Luna By Tessa Lilly"
March 8, 2023In "True Luna By Tessa Lilly"
March 5, 2023In "True Luna By Tessa Lilly"