The Soldier Next Door

Secrets and lies that is what our relationship has been made up of. To be very honest, not one of the best ways to start a relationship on. If this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, then maybe you should reevaluate your choices. Your choices affect your future, defining moments shape you, and love is what keeps you whole. So make sure you do it right from the start.

The thing is, if you tell a lie once, then all your truths are questionable. They say a truth does not cost you anything but a lie will cost you everything. Secrets and lies will kill a relationship; no matter how careful you are, you are going to get caught.

Should there really be any more secrets between us? I mean, is there really a point where you have to bend the truth as far as you possibly can. But is a secret and a lie the same thing? Technically not. But to the person on the other side of this question, they are both equally the same.

No matter which way you look at it, I have kept and twisted things from Ana in more than one way or the other for far too long. It is time I come clean. The consequences I am going to have to take and hope that it does not end off bad. At least if I walk away, I walk away with a clear mind.

“Boo, I want to tell you something.”

“What is wrong, soldier?”

“I have done something really bad.”

“What can possibly be worse than what I have just told you?”

“Oh, believe me, there is something a whole lot worse.”

“Okay, soldier, let’s hear it then.”

“I kept a horrible secret from you. Hopefully, you only kick my ass and not leave me this time.”

“I am so tired of there being this time. I want us to be open and honest with each other.”

“I feel I just need to say this in case I do not get a chance to say it again.”

“What do you need to say?”

“That I love you and that I have never been so damn happy in my entire life as when I am with you. You take what was broken, and you make me complete. You are not only my rock to stand on, but you are the leg I need to stand on that rock.”

“I love you too, soldier. I might not need a leg, but you give me all the other things that I have been lacking in my life.”

“Like a husband?”

“I would not say a husband but definitely a companion; you know someone you could spend your life with.”

“You say this as if you do not see me as someone that can be a husband.”

“No soldier, don’t get me wrong. I am just saying that I have not given things much thought as to when I will be ready to get married again. Losing someone like that tends to make you scared to do the same things, especially things like getting married.”

“So, if I was to ask you, then you will say no?”

“Hopefully, you are not asking me now cause I would say it is the strangest way to go about it. But I don’t think it is what you want to talk to me about, is it?”

“Well, this is sort of; actually, it is about your husband.”

“What do you mean? How can this be about Mark?”

“Yes your husband, Mark Jenkins.”

“What is going on, soldier? I can’t recall that I told you what his last name is.”

“No, you did not; you gave me your last name, the one you had before you were married.”

I watch her as she moves around uncomfortably in her chair. She is no longer holding my hand, and the smile that was on her face has disappeared. She is preparing herself for something terrible but of what she does not know yet.

There is no turning back; I am going to have to finish what I have started. If I back down, it will make me worse of a liar than I already am, and I know I will most definitely lose her then

I take her small hands into mine and give them a soft squeeze. I gently place a kiss on her palm then lay them comfortably down on my lap. She gives me a twitch of the lips, which is something short of a smile. When I look into those big brown eyes, I can’t help but think of the pain I am about to put in them again.

“Your husband’s platoon leader was Lopez?”

“Yes that is right. He deployed the same time as you did, but you never told me which base you were at? How would you have known that unless if you were at the same base?”

“We were in the same company. Evans and Lopez were in the same company.”

“Which means at the same base?”

“Well, normally, it does work like that.”

“This is not a joke soldier, what is going on?”Property belongs to Nôvel(D)r/ama.Org.

“I think you got your answer already. You see, I knew your husband; we were at the same base deployed at the same time. The only thing is that I never saw you once while I was there, but then again, I did not need a medic during the time you were probably there.”

“So let me get this straight. You knew who my husband was, and you have not told me about it?”

“Yes, boo. I only realized who your husband was when you told me his name and what had happened to him.”

“And you think that only now is a good time to tell me? It’s been how long, and you only say something to me now?”

“I did not want to hurt you boo, you have been through enough shit for me to remind you about it.”

“Why don’t you let me be the judge about it? How long were you going to keep this from me? Were you actually going to tell me at all?”

“Boo, please, I thought I was doing the right thing. It is bad enough that I remind you of your husband, and now you know that I knew him too.”

“You are wrong there, soldier. You don’t remind me of my husband; you remind me of you. Yes, Mark was my husband, and yes, I loved him. But he is dead, and you are alive; I must move on. It is sad what happened to you both, but you are here, and I am here, and for once can the goddamn secrets and lies stop between us.”

“Does this mean you are not mad at me?”

“Disappointed but not mad. I mean, the chances of you two know each other was strong. Hell, if I never told you about my ex-husband’s story, then you would have told me.”

“That is the first time I hear you say that.”

“Say what?”

“Ex husband, you never say, ex.”

“Well maybe one day I would like to call you my husband. So what do you say? No more secrets and lies?”

“No more secrets and lies, I promise.”

“Then are we going to do this? Are we going to deploy together?”

“Fuck boo, what question is that? Of course, I want to do that.”

“Then I have one more question for you.”

“And what would that be?”

“Will you come to stay here with me? We are going to be apart for a lot of days sometimes, so let’s start making the most of it now.”

“Are you sure, boo? I mean, we have not been together for that long. Are you ready to take a big step like that?”

“Soldier, I am packing up my life to follow you. Moving in together is baby steps.”

“Then yes, I want to, I want to take baby steps with you.”

“Come here, you silly man.”

I hold my arms open in invitation, and she flings herself into my embrace. She buries her face into the crook of my neck, and we stand like that for a while. It feels like the world has slipped away, and everything has stopped. Being here in the warmth of her arms, I wish that this moment would never end. Everything feels so right and so perfect. We are not alone in this; we are in love together.

She looks up to me and talks so soft it is barely a whisper.

“Please don’t ever leave me.”

“Boo, I promise you that I will never leave you; you will never be alone.”

I press her head against my chest and lightly stroke her long brown hair.

“Promise that you will never leave me too?”

“How are you going to walk if I take your leg away from you?”

“Hahaha just as long as you don’t take the rock away too.”

“Hahaha, guess I am never leaving you then.”

“You know what book.”

“No soldier, what should I know?”

“That I love you.”

“I love you too, soldier.”

“So, are you ready for this? Can we do this?”