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I continued to s**, heartbroken at everything I knew I was losing my mother’s voice in my head continued to scream how useless and worthless I was. How I was to much trouble to love, and no one would ever want me. I tangled my fingers through any hair, f**g it and pulling as hard as I could, trying to get the hamble voice to leave. “NO, no, no,” I wailed, 1 began rocking back and forth, allowing my head to hit the cabinets behind me. Maybe if 1 hit my head hard enough the voice would
shut up.
Before I could do anything to hurt myself, I felt a set of hands grabbing my shoulders trying to calm me. When someone tried to pick me up. I froze for a second. and then my fight response locked in, and I started to fight against whoever was holding me. Screaming and crying the whole time, begging for my guys to come back, promising I would be easier to love. I could feel movement and heard voices-amund me, but I couldn’t tell one wire from another. I continued crying, pleading. and calling for my guys to come back. That I loved them all, and I was sorry, and I didnt want to be alone. More voices surrounded me, hands touching me, there was more movement, and the sensation of being lowered down, big arms were wrapped around me again, and the small part of my brain that was still working told me I was being held on someones lap. I continued to wiggle, trying to escape; another set of hands were on my shoulders now, trying to hold me still There was a stab of pain in my arm and then a stinging sensation. I continued to cry calling for my guys, as more hands tried to hold me still. My brain began to feel slow and fuzzy, the fight response leaving my body, the feeling of warmth washed over my body; the voices sounded further and further away, and that was the last thing I noticed before everything went dark
Bit by bit my brain started to come back online. The first thing I noticed was how cory and warm I was. I could feel bodies pressed on either side of me, and I so wanted to sink back into oblivion. I felt like I had been run over by a truck, and the truck had backed up and run over me again, everything hurt including my hair. 1 had almost no memory of what happened earlier. I remember talking to Patrick about all of us sitting down and talking, making breakfast, and eating. Then I was feeling anxious about talking to everyone at once, and leaving the table. After that, everything was confusing. A strange fuzzy mess of sensations that made no
After several minutes of trying to figure out what had happened, I forced my eyes open. When my eyes were able to focus, I was inches from a shirtless back that was covered in tattoos. At that moment, my brain helped by kicking in, and I recognized Patrick. I felt another arm across my waist, and after squirming a little I was able to see Drew pressed against my back. I didn’t recognize the room I was in, but knowing Patrick and Drew were next to me, I wasn’t scared. After a few more wiggles,
was able to sit up. The room spun a little, making me dicry, and my stomach protested at the mo
movement. So I sat still, eyes closed, waiting for the sensation to
After a few minutes, I tried opening my eyes again. When everything stayed in place, I turned my head to the left and paused even more confused. In the low light. I could see two beds pushed together. I was on one, sandwiched between Patrick and Drew, while Mike and the twins were spread across the other. I still didn’t recognize where we were; the blinds had all been drawn down over the windows, allowing the room to stay dim, even though I could see the sun shining around the edges of them.
I stretched, rubbing my eyes. While I was trying to remember why my eyes and face hurt, my scalp was sore too, and I groaned as I ran my fingers through my hair. I must have made just enough noise, because Patrick and Drew both sat up, their eyes zeroing in on me.
“What happened? Why do I feel like I have been run over by several large trucks, and where are we? Why are we all on one enormous bed?” I took a breath after listing off my most important questions, and I saw the guys shoot a glance at each other over my head. I was starting to get worried when Patrick scooped me up, cuddling me close to him, pressing kisses to the top of my head. My eyes ping ponged between Patrick and Drew very lost as to what was going on.
“Would someone please tell me what happened? You’re both starting to scare me,” I said, looking between Drew and Patrick again. Patrick just held me tighter, burying his head into my neck and murmuring that he loved me over and over again looked up at Drew, and he reached out, cupping my face in his hands, searching my eyes before leaning toward me, and kissing my forehead. “Would you tell me what the hell is going un?” growled at Drew. Please.” I tacked on as an afterthought. I must have been talking a little too loud becane Mike shot up off the end of the bed, eyes focused on me. Taking a deep breath as if centering himself, he shook both of the twins legs, startling them awake as well. When they same sitting up, they scrambled off their side of the bed, hurrying around to where I still sat between Patrick and Drew, they climbed onto the bed, pulling me to them, Patrick and Drew backing up just enough to give them some spate.
They each wrapped themselves around me, p
pressing kisses to my cheeks and head, both swearing they would never leave my side. I looked up at Mike, who had made his way around the bed, looking like he was ready to pull me out from between the twins.” Mike, I’m scared. Why is everyone acting like this?” I asked, reaching for his hand and pulling him into the pile of bodies gathered on the bed.
Mike took another deep breath before answering Emory, honey, what do you remember from earlier?” he asked, cupping my face just like Drew had moments before. Still confused, I went over what I could remember from the time I got up, leaving Drew still asleep in my bed to everyone sitting down and eating breakfast, admitting that I was very stressed about our family meeting. Then I got up from the table because I was so anxious, and that negative voice in my head kept telling me horrible things. I thought moving would help. I went to the bathroom, and that in the last thing I remember.” I finished. All the guys were sitting around me as clase as they could get without climbing into my lap.
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