From Bully To Beloved

Her eyes widen. “She asked you to take over?”

I nod.

“What did you say?”

“I told her I’d do it.”

Instead of congratulating me, Kelly steps closer and says in a low voice, “And you are not happy about that.”

“It’s a huge opportunity. Besides, it’s not like we didn’t know this was coming.”

Kelly’s expression softens. “If this is really what you want, you know I’ll support you.”

Of course it’s not what I want. Not deep down. I know that now more than ever. But how can I disappoint Marie? After everything she’s done for me? She’s been counting on me to take over for years. This was always the plan. I can’t do that to her.

“I’ll be fine, Kelly,” I assure her. “It’s going to be good. Besides, this means you and I can finally implement some of those changes we’ve been wanting to make for a while. Like the schedule overlapping and stuff.”

Kelly’s smile doesn’t quite reach her eyes, and I know she can sense I’m putting on a brave face. “That’d be awesome,” she says. “You’re going to besogreat.”

I give her a quick hug. “Come on, let’s get to work. We open soon.”

When the breakfast rush starts, I’m grateful to throw myself into my work. It keeps my mind focused on something other than the momentous changes quickly approaching. It also reminds me how much I love this job and the people I encounter. The more of the day that passes by, the more I warm to the idea of taking over.

I’ve always wanted to move the tables around for better flow. Oh, my God, and I can paint over this-let’s face it-hideous pink color and get cuter uniforms for the waitresses. All this might have been cute in the past, but I believe we can do so much better. In between rushes, Marie has me sit with her while she goes over some of the finer details of restaurant management.

By the time I get home, my head is spinning.

Coltonisn’t home when I get there. It’s crazy how, without realizing it, I’ve started thinking of the apartment as my home. I haven’t thought about my old place in weeks, aside from the occasional text from my friend who’s subletting the apartment in my absence. I take some time to unwind, but can’t seem to turn off my brain. Not even my sketchbook provides relief. I start to draw, but get so distracted that I end up staring off into space.

When Coltonarrives home, that’s how he finds me: sitting on the couch, pencil loose between my fingers, as I stare out the window.

“Hello, Earth to Sera,” he says, his fingers softly brushing my head.

I blink, returning to myself. “Oh, hey. I didn’t hear you come in.”

“Clearly.” He collapses next to me on the sofa, throwing his arm around my shoulders. “What’s up? You look like you have a lot on your mind.”

“You can say that again.”

“Come on, talk to me. What are husbands for?”

I take a moment to gather my thoughts, busying myself with closing my sketchbook and putting my supplies away. “Marie pulled me aside this morning to talk to me.”

“Everything all right?”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s fine. She wanted to officially ask me to take over The Diner when she retires.”

Coltonrubs my shoulder soothingly. “How did she take it when you turned her down?”

I bite my lip and look away from him. “I didn’t.”

His hand stops moving. “What do you mean you didn’t?”

“I didn’t turn her down. I said I’d do it.”

When I look up at Cal, he’s frowning. “Why?”

“What do you mean ‘why’?”

“I mean, itisa good financial opportunity, but there are better financial opportunities out there-especially if you factor in the inheritance. Why did you agree to take over running a diner when you have other plans, when you have no interest in it?” It’s apparent by his tone of voice that he’s upset.

“That’s not entirely true. I mean, I havesomeinterest in it. Besides, it’s not like her request blindsided me. I knew it was going to happen.”

“Yeah, and I thought once you got your inheritance you were going to focus on your art.”

“I still am.”

“How the hell are you going to be able to do that when you have a whole other business to run? Do you know how much time goes into running a business?”

“Why are you getting all bent out of shape about this?” I ask, growing frustrated. “It’s my life and my decision.”

Coltonsnorts and gets to his feet. “Yeah, sure it is.”

I don’t like his tone of voice or what he mumbles under his breath. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that once again, Goody-Goody Sera is doing what she’s told, instead of deciding for herself.”

I hate when he calls me that.

Who the hell does he think he is?

Just because we’re sleeping together doesn’t mean that he gets to judge me or the choices I make. “Screw you, Cal,” I snap, getting to my feet. “You have no idea what kind of situation I’m in. I couldn’t just turn her down.”

“Of course you could. It’s easy. All you had to say was, ‘I’m not interested.’ Simple as that.”

“Nothing iseverthat simple.”

“It is if you’re not scared to take a risk!”

“This has nothing to do with taking risks,” I snap. My anger mounts the longer we argue. I can’t help it. I’ve been taking care of myself and making my own decisions my entire adult life. I don’t answer to anyone, especially nothim. Him, of all people! He doesn’t get a say in what I do. He doesn’t get to make comments on my choices.

“Then what’s stopping you, Sera?” he presses. “What’s scaring you about moving on from that place?”

“Marie was there for me when no one else was! She’s been like a mother to me these last few years. How can I look her in the eye and tell her that all the time and energy she put into helping me, teaching me, was for nothing? Besides, it’s not like I was going to quit the diner once the inheritance came through. There’s no harm in staying on longer. As the manager and owner, I’ll be able to set my own schedule, do things my way-”

“We both know that you will work harder than anyone else. Don’t kid yourself. But that’s not the point, Sera,” Coltoninterrupts. “The point is that you’re an artist. You’re meant to be drawing and creating. Don’t use the diner as an excuse not to follow your dreams.”

“That’s not what’s happening here,” I nearly shout.

“Bullshit! That’sexactlywhat’s happening.”

“No, it’snot. What’s happening here is someone is depending on me, and I’m not going to let them down. I can’t let them down. Not thatyouwould know anything about that.”

There’s a pause.

Cal’s eyes flare. “Excuse me?”

My body is shaking with rage, and I have to clench my hands into fists to stop the trembling. I’ve never been this angry in my life. “You don’t know me! You don’t get to judge me,” I snap. “You only have yourself to worry about! You have no idea what it means to have someone depend on you so much that you can’t even entertain the thought of disappointing them. You do whatever you want, when you want. You always have! So don’t youdarestand there, trying to tell me how to live my life when you’veneverbeen in my shoes.”Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.

“That’s unfair and not true, and you know it. But we’re not talking aboutme,” Coltonsnaps back. “We’re talking aboutyou. This is not me judging you. We’re talking about how you never stand up for yourself.”

“I never stand up for myself? Are you kidding me?”

“Sera, for fuck’s sake, you have a chance here to make your dreams come true, and you’re throwing it away.”

“I’m not throwinganythingaway. I’m still going to do my art. And sell it.”

“When? Because Kelly has given you this amazing opportunity to do just that, and you keep coming up with excuses.”