Chapter 0197
I couldn't remember how I ended up on the bed with Dylan last night... Or maybe I did, I just didn't want to recall it, I couldn't. I feel sore all over. And right now, all I feel is extreme tiredness and a gnawing hunger.
Dylan fucking whoever he really was, was a greedy and insatiable man. It only took not more than twenty minutes after pulling away from me for him to get on top of me again. He kept grinding me like he was some beast, ordering me to keep telling him I loved him. What type of psycho was that?
I actually wished the gnawing hunger was related to my tiredness or even a little something to do with it but no. The louder my cries and fake moans mixed with his loud grunts got, the higher my hatred for him heightened. My hunger for revenge was making me starved and I needed to collect myself before I did something really stupid and get myself killed.NôvelDrama.Org owns all content.
Every touch of his hands on my skin made me want to recoil in disgust. The weight of his body pinning me down was like being smothered by a massive rock. Each thrust felt like a violation, yet I had to feign pleasure to keep up this sickening charade. With every passing minute, I could feel my soul being chipped away bit by bit.
1 also noticed that he hadn't used protection. He usually remembered to use it when he pretended to be Lucas, apart from the times where we weren't acting like rowdy animals. The only thing I was grateful for was that I had an IUD installed before coming to Italy.
When I still thought I was abandoned, I knew I was mad at Lucas. Raving mad but it never extended to hating him. I still loved him, I was just angry and sad that he left but he not only leave, he left without so much as an appropriate goodbye. So I was worried that I might not be able to control my sexual desires if I ever found him which might in turn lead to another pregnancy - which I was sure I would not be ready for, no doubt.
At first, I didn't want to admit it because the thought itself was embarrassing but I had to come to terms with myself and do the needful, Now, it was what would save me from having another
A small mercy amidst this living nightmare.
'd for this man.
My stomach growled and I silently moaned as I clutched it, I was starving in the literal sense. The fucker couldn't even have the decency to order us some food before he sucked all of the strength out of me. Just another display of his utter selfishness and lack of care for me as a person. I was merely an object to be used for his twisted desires.
I briefly glanced at his plastic face. He was still sound asleep. I sighed and turned away from him on the bed. Then I quietly rose from my sleeping position and sat at the edge of the bed so I wouldn't disturb him. In truth, I didn't want him to wake up yet because I wasn't ready to hear his commanding voice or see his sickening smirk. I needed this little time alone so that I could be able to prepare myself for the horrible day ahead. These fleeting moments of solitude were my only reprieve.
As I was about to get on my feet, my roaming eyes fell on a handgun - the one from yesterday - hanging cut of the pocket of his jacket on the coat rack. My gaze glued to it and my heart rate quickened, slamming against my chest as it did. Should I pick it up? If I could quietly reach there and grab the gun without waking me up, I would only be a trigger away from ending all of this and fulfilling my wish.
It would be quick and easy. All I have to do is slightly hurt myself so that I would be able to feign to the
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hotel security that I shot him in self-defense. I almost went through with it; I almost leapt out of bed and tiptoed there but then... It could be a test. No, I wouldn't do it. Seeing that, he was still having trouble believing that I loved him, even as he fucked me throughout the night, the psycho might put me through some sick tests that were as sick as his head.
So I diminished every thought of killing him in his sleep. Besides what satisfaction was there in killing him while he was asleep? That would be a peaceful death at most. I need him to feel that tightening in his chest after I've made him believe me and love me back when I turn the gun on him. If I killed him now, I'd only be confirming his suspicion which in some way would be satisfying to him. No, he didn't deserve such an easy end. He needed to suffer first....
Suddenly, I felt a prickle at the back of my neck and I knew that I was being watched at that very moment but I didn't dare to look back.